AUTHOR: Robert TITLE: Finding my way... DATE: 12/14/2007 05:50:00 PM ----- BODY: Lately, Adam and I have been very inspired by two things its like a sort of "Harmonic Convergence" of ideas that have come into our lives that are causing a great deal of change all at once, and its all GOOD change, but its change nonetheless. I thought I'd take a moment to write about some of these things and how / why they are impacting our lives. I'll write about them in order of their appearance in our lives, rather than their significance because that significance can change from moment to moment and situation to situation. 1. The Law of Attraction / The Secret / New Thought -- whatever you want to call it We were first introduced to this concept through the movie "What the bleep" -- and though I realize that many people think its a bunch of hooey (that's a technical term, by the way) I personally believe that at some deep level, the "law" of attraction works -- though I don't fully understand how or why -- and I certainly can't answer tough questions about it. I am very much drawn to one of the speakers in the movie, her name is Lisa Nichols -- huh, I wonder if she's related to Nichelle Nichols at all... not that two beautiful black women can't have the same last name and not be related -- just curious. I've met Nichelle, and have a photo of myself with her when she performed with us in the San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus. Unfortunately, I had WAAAAAY too much makeup left on from the show, so its not a photo I like to show to folks. Anyway, as I said, I don't know why the Law of Attraction works well for me and yet there are still starving people in the world, or why there's so much pain and suffering when the universe works in such abundant ways -- those are great questions, and I certainly don't want to blame those starving people for attracting their situation -- and that seems to be where everybody gets stuck... I for one do not get stuck there, I say to myself that though these horrible things are true today, it doesn't mean that they aren't on a path towards healing, and it doesn't mean that humanity and its development is not an incredible thing, and it doesn't mean that the Law of Attraction doesn't work. I know that it works for me -- its worked for me in incredibly huge ways, and you know, so what if some people think its a gimmick or think it doesn't work? One of our friends has been so stuck in negativity around a particular issue -- I sat with her and worked out some things and I hope it helped... her issue is that she's reaching an age where she feels that she should be married and / or have a kid by now, and she's not even dating anyone much less any closer to getting married. She's miserable about it -- and I mean miserable. She cries about it a lot and -- well, you know, its tough to watch her going through it. So, at the risk of sounding glib to her, I asked that she sit and watch the secret with me... and we talked for a long time -- and at the end of the time I had come to the place where I said "Look, so let's say you decide right now that there's the PERFECT man for you out there. And he's on his way right now and he'll be here in about three weeks. Let's say you go home, and you clean the house in order to get ready for him... you get your hair done, your nails done, if you've got the money buy a new outfit, try some new makeup, etc. Just GET READY for him to show up. Spend a little time every day thinking about what you're going to do when he gets here. Spend a little time each day feeling how its going to feel when he finally arrives. Really let yourself get excited about it and a bit giddy if you like. And -- in the meantime, let's take some of the responsibility off of his shoulders, it seems like he's got a lot to do when he gets there -- like you know, having a baby with you, being able to support your family at least partially, being somebody who understands you... so maybe if you did some of that stuff yourself he might feel more like showing up? Maybe have a baby on your own... maybe see how you can improve your financial situation (though I'm one to talk....) to prepare for a child... maybe write a manual on "getting to know _________ _________" so that he can read it when he arrives? And Ok, so let's say you do a little bit of this every day -- and you do all the things you want to do with your life, but have been waiting until that special someone arrives -- and you spend some time each day feeling how great its going to feel when he gets there. And so let's also say you get to the end of your life and he never showed up -- he got lost along the way, or hit by a bus, or met someone else... or any number of things happened, but he didn't show up. Are you better off for having lived your life to its fullest, feeling excited that he was going to be there any day, or would you have been better off if you were sad and disappointed all the time and drove all of your friends away because you were a bummer to be around? So, in the end, who CARES if the secret works or not for getting you that man, or getting you rich or getting you that thing or parking place or blah blah blah.... CHOOSE to feel good, choose to follow your bliss anyway. And I bet you -- if you really do get ready for him to show up, and you really feel those feelings and really see him clearly (Good on you! Now paint it!) I just bet you he'll show up. All that having been said, "The Secret" is a really positive, great feeling movie to see -- and it can be hilarious in places where its probably not supposed to be. And it really seems to me like the people who made the movie would think that was funny too... There's this one place where one of the teachers in the movie (she's a Feng Sheui [sp?] master) has this really great face that's very expressive and she has a wonderful accent -- and you know how in America we say "Good for you!" well, in her native language, I guess they say "Good ON you" -- and she meets this guy who has painted all this negative stuff, and he's saying how he doesn't want the negative stuff and he wants the positive stuff, and she says very emphatically "GOOD on YOU! Now PAINT IT!" and that's become a really funny catch-phrase around our house meaning "All that you just said sounds really cool. Now, quit yer yappin and DO IT!" 2. Elle Woods / Legally Blonde The Musical Ok, ok... i get it "Fight the Stereotype" -- But there's actually a great connection here. Legally Blonde (the movie) is really about taking your inner-self and manifesting it in reality, despite what others may think of you... and not giving in to stereotypes ... and learning to laugh at them at the same time. Its about taking responsibility for your own actions in life, what you've done to get yourself where you are, that you and you alone can get you out of the situation you're in if you don't like it, and if you don't like it... "Good on YOU, now PAINT IT!" For those of you who don't know the story, a brief synopsys:

Elle Woods (Reese Witherspoon) has it all. She's the president of her sorority, a Hawaiian Tropic girl, Miss June in her campus calendar, and, above all, a natural blonde. She dates the cutest fraternity boy on campus and wants nothing more than to be Mrs. Warner Huntington III. But, there?s just one thing stopping Warner (Matthew Davis) from popping the question: Elle is too blonde. Growing up across the street from Aaron Spelling might mean something in LA, but nothing to Warner?s East-Coast blue blood family. So, when Warner packs up for Harvard Law and reunites with an old sweetheart from prep school, Elle rallies all her resources and gets into Harvard, determined to win him back. But law school is a far cry from the comforts of her poolside and the mall. Elle must wage the battle of her life, for her guy, for herself and for all the blondes who suffer endless indignities everyday. Based upon the book by Amanda Brown

So... well, to keep this as short as possible, here's some lyrics from one of the songs near the end of the musical right after Warner gets dumped by his "Evil Preppy with a mousy brown Bob" and finally proposes to Elle:
"though I dreamed of this day long ago, now my answer is 'Thank you but no'. Look, I've barely begun, I'm hardly through... I was living in ignorant bliss...'till I learned I could be more than this...and you know, in a way I owe it all to you. I thought losing your love was a blow I could never withstand -- but look how far I have come without anyone holding my hand! I *had* to find my way -- the day you broke my heart -- you handed me the chance -- to make a brand new start -- you helped me find my way -- there's still so much to learn -- so many dreams to earn, but even if I crash and burn ten times a day, I think I'm here to stay, I'm gonna find my way."
So, I say that now. I say it to the Universe, to Microsoft, to Kerie, to everyone. To thine own self be true -- and it must follow as the night the day, thou canst not be false to any man. I thank all of the things that happened in my life -- I thank them one and all, the ones who thought I'd fall who taught me how to fail, who helped me to prevail. I'm standing here today. You helped me find my way. OMIGOD YOU GUYS, ELLE WOODS KNOWS THE SECRET! ----- --------